The baby in Mommy's tummy

We're pretty sure she understands that there is a baby in my tummy. In fact, she spontaneously kissed my belly the other day, bringing tears to my eyes. We've been asking her if she thinks it's a boy or a girl, but her answer to that changes pretty often. We've also asked her what she thinks the name should be and her answer lately has been 'Chi chi waji'. In fact, she tonight she told me that the baby in her tummy is also called Chichiwaji. We haven't thought of very many possible names for this baby, but somehow I'm afraid Chichiwaji is going to stick.

Mock mock?

Mia can count to 12 and sing the ABC song like a pro. This week, every time she finishes the song she says 'mock mock'. Neither of us can figure out where it came from, and she is very cryptic when telling us what it means. We may never know.... not unlike the milky-cici mystery.

Questions

"What doing?"
"How do it?"
Those two were repeated and repeated and have now evolved into;
"What's he doing/saying?"
"What's him name?"

I know "Why?" is coming soon...

ABC ya yoga

Anytime she leaves a room or a person or even changes activities, she says, "ABC ya"or "see-a yater" or "bye (toy, room or person)". It's cool she has such a strong sense of closure about things. It also makes it easier to get her to put away her toys when she is done with them.

My mom loves to tell a story about me when I was little: I would put on her shoes and pick up her purse and walk around the house saying, "I'm going to 'nassas." The apple doesn't fall far from the tree - Mia loves to empty all my shoes out of my closet and shuffle around in the heels and she also walks around the house saying she's going to yoga!

she says

When I ask her, "how many?" she counts, "1,2,3,6,9,2,3, yay!"

birth story - Nile's version

My trip to U.S. was planned for a long time already. Initially I had announced my visit for at least one month earlier but then flights were more expensive during peak time and “ of course - I wasn't in time with the stuff I had to do for university, that's why I also brought my books with me. So I was rather astonished that Allison stayed so cool and was sure that I could visit any time I wanted to even if it was two weeks before the pronounced birth date. I'm sure there are many going to be mothers who wouldn't be so relaxed about it. When I arrived at JFK airport, Allison, Priya and Arun picked me up. They got there with the shuttle airport service having to cope with delays which made their journey even longer than it was anyways. Basically all the time it was amazing for me to see how much energy Allison still had to walk around, looking very healthy and in good shape. Also for the next three days we were running around a lot. I was feeling tired in the evening and couldn't make out any difference between me and Allison except for the extra weight that she was wearing in her belly and the happy beaming expression on her face.

For the first couple of days I stayed at Allisons and Aruns place. One afternoon when Priya was visiting, Allison wanted to do her gestational Yoga and we decided to join her. When the three of us were standing in front of the TV in a half circle, Priya and I were pretty surprised how exhausting Yoga for pregnant women can be. Allison was doing much better than we were doing.

The evening before Mia was born we went to see 'Vanity Fair' in a movie theatre. When Allsion and me were waiting for the Bus to take us back Midtown, she was telling me that she was having a slight bleeding, which could mean the beginning of the birth, but which could be caused also by all the running around that we had done all day long. To me it sounded pretty much like there was going to happen something soon, but Allison tried to stay calm. She didn't want to give wrong alarm and call Arun in the middle of the night for no reason at his parents place or make him return although not necessary. So we went to sleep after we got home. Thinking that she could wait till the amniotic sac would open or labor pains would start. Which would have been pretty late, considering how fast everything was happening this night, something we didn't know at that point.

I have difficulties to remember how this night exactely went on, so I'll try to get it together the best I remember. Not long after we had gone to sleep I woke up, around one I guess. Allison was going to the toilet and I was asking her if everything was okay. I think she said something like she wasn't feeling too well and wasn't sure if labor pain started. So she went back to bed, I set down next to her and we were talking about what to do. We decided that it would be a good idea to at least call Arun so that he could give his opinion on what to do. Arun wanted to check which was the next flight he could get to NY and called back saying he got the first flight around five in the morning. Not much later it was out of question if labor pain had started, it definitely had. We spend the next couple of hours talking and taking short naps, that were interupted by labor pains that got more and more regular. I can't even remember what we were talking about during that night, I was trying my best to take Allisons focus from the labor pain, which was kind of a silly try, 'cause when she was having labor pains of course there wasn't anything else she was able to focus on except for her breath maybe. So as the night went on, there was less talking and more breathing. At some point when labor pains were coming already in pretty short intervals and were long-standing, Allison decided to take a shower- I can't remember if this was because the amniotic sac had opened? But I remember that I was feeling already a little worried at that point if everything was going to be alright, but it did.

After the shower we changed place and went to the living room where we were listening to some classical music, one of the cd's was a record of a beethoven symphonie that I had brought from home. Labor pain was growing stronger very fast by that time and I strated getting worried. Before I had been pretty relaxed having been at my little sisters birth when I was eleven years old and my mother decided on getting her baby at home. So I knew in a certain way what was expecting me. But around six in the morning when labor pain got really strong and Allison squat on the floor, holding that green gym ball and started breathing very strong and I could read the pain on her face, I didn't feel very relaxed or experienced anymore.

I went out to get some getorade drink that the midwife had recommended (because of the minerals it contained), who Allison had finally been able to talk to. I found it hard in this situation to understand why the midwife was still so relaxed and couldn't do anything better than recommending an energy drink but I guess that's the large experience she has ahead of me. When I got back there was this weird music playing, kind of Hip Hop music, way to loud and not tranqualizing at all. I was irritated, wondering if Allison seriously wanted to listen to that kind of music in this situation. But when the wave of labor pain was over that she had to endure when I got home, she explained to me that the cd changer had chosen the cd and she wasn't able to stop the music because she was occupied with something different at that time, obviously. There wasn't much time left to drink the gettorade stuff while Mia was strongly asking for her way out by that time.

During another labor pain, Arun called and was telling me that he landed at the airport and was going to be home pretty soon. Good news! By that time I was already thinking that we would have to drive to the hospital without Arun, so it was a big relief to see him there half an hour later. When he got in, he seemed to deal pretty well with the situation, supporting Allison, having recommendations how to breathe and being much more in control of the situation than I felt. At least he seemed to be and maybe that's the good result of the preparatory course plus he was prepared much better and for a much longer time that he would experience the birth of his daughter while I hadn't expected to take part in it. Everything happened pretty fast. Arun called a cab that got there a short time later. He took the bags that they had packed for the hospital and then they left. I said good bye and wished them luck. From the window I only saw them entering the taxi, Allison rather crawling on all fours and then the cab was on the way to the hospital. I went to sleep for a couple of hours to take a rest, something that Allison still had to wait a little longer for.

After a couple of days, where Allison, Arun and Mia had had some time on their on and with their families, Priya and I went to visit and say hallo to Mia. It was a very good feeling to see the happy family and to hold Mia in my arms, knowing what this night was good for. Eventough I'm sure it would have been nicer for you Allison and Arun, to have experienced that whole night together when Mia was born, I'm grateful that I've had the opportunity to be there and share this with Allison. And at the right moment Arun made it there in time.

Much love to all three of you, Nile

it's in her blood

She started singing a week or so ago. She sings Victor Vito, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Nana's crocodile song, and random Wiggles songs.

She's a natural.

she says

Milky see see. Not sure what that means.

Ouchie. When she has an actual ouchie and when she is scared or if she just wants somehting to stop.

Butty. Belly button.

Mia milky

Since Mia has learned to say milky, that is what I hear when she wakes up in the middle of the night. Sigh. But it is cute.

And even cuter is when she gives milky to her dolls. She calls it Mia milky and squishes the doll's face into her stomach.

She says

She is mastering possessives. Daddy shoes. Mommy shirt. Mia water.

These are also the first 2 word phases she has said, besides 'read it', 'eat it' and 'hold it'.

sleep and snot

OK, so Mia's never been a good sleeper. She wakes up at night to nurse at least 2-3 times on a good night, and if she's teething or sick forget it. I can't even count. She'll basically nurse the whole night. But fine, that's the way it is, and I'll just keep complaining about it until she stops waking up at night.

And then there is also the issue of the bed time. Kids go to bed at 7 or 8 right? Not Miss Mia. The other night she was up until 11:30pm. She wasn't cranky or fussy, just playing and not sleeping. That was on Saturday. We usually get her to sleep around 10 on a normal night. Then last night she fell asleep in the car (holy crap! but that's a story for another entry) at 7:20pm. I was so scared she would think it was a nap and be awake all night, but no, she slept until 8am. She didn't even nurse that much. Amazing. I actually feel rested today.

We've just gotten over the worst of a round of colds; starting off with Mia, moving on to me, and Arun was only a day or so behind. It was a yucky snotty cold that had Mia projectile sneezing and us blowing our noses every 5 minutes. It had me knocked on my back. I was so tired and sore all over for 3 or 4 days. I know it's the same thing that Mia had, but she seemed fine during the day. She took even shorter naps, and nursed all night. Why didn't she get sleepy like we did? What is it about toddlers that keeps them going like nothing is wrong through the worst viruses?
She did make up for it by being especially cute while she was sick. She mimicked the things we said to her, like when she coughed she said, "'Kay?" as in Mommy asking if she was OK after she coughed. And after she sneezed she'd hold her nose up in the air until I wiped it and then she'd say, "better." as in 'that's better' after wiping her nose.

Even her snot is cute.

the signs are on the way out

We realized today that Mia is dropping signs since her language has gotten more understandable. She made up a sign for 'go' a long time ago - waving her hand up and down with her fingers together, usually with the word 'dee-do' which means upstairs, downstairs or outside. Arun noticed tonight that we haven't seen that sign in weeks. She just says dee-do.

She doesn't use many signs anymore unless I don't get what she is saying. Example - she'll say 'ba' (ball) and if I don't at least acknowledge that is what she is saying, she'll say it and use the sign with a come-on-mom look on her face.

Funny thing about her language - she still uses the animal sounds to identify the animals and not their names. Most are still moo or baa or ca-doo-doo (cock-a-doodle-doo). My favorite animal name right now is 'mingo' for flamingo. I kinda hope she never learns the other way to say that one.

she says

On the cruise, she thought we were calling her bathing suit a baby suit. She called the hot tub bubbles.

birth story - mommy's version

Nile was visiting from Germany and staying with us. So maybe it was the walking we did around the city, although I walked everywhere before that, too. Maybe it was Bhangra Against Bush that pushed me over the top.

Arun's dad's mother in Kakinada had passed away, so a couple days into Nile's visit Arun went to Richmond to be with his parents. Should we worry that it was 2 weeks before my due date? Guess not, but I do have to say I didn't want him to leave. But I wasn't alone since Nile was there and everyone goes past their due date with their first baby, right?

So, Arun left Sat am and Nile, Priya and I went to a BBQ at Priya's friend Yohe's (sp?) friend's place on the Upper West Side. It was a nice day so we sat outside and ate and ate and ate. I remember I ate a ton of food. After we left there we went to see Vanity Fair at a movie theater near there.

Nile and I got back to our place at about 1:00am. At 2:30 I woke up with cramps at the bottom of my belly. I thought it was because I ate too much or maybe didn't drink enough water, so I drank some water and went to the bathroom. Not that it's of any consequence, but I was also sleeping on Arun's side of the bed.

I don't think I was able to fall back asleep. I went to the bathroom probably 2 or 3 times with diarrhea and then threw up what was left in my stomach. By this point I was worried about getting dehydrated so I was trying to drink a lot of water, but I would just throw it back up. Nile woke up to use the bathroom and I was lying in bed not sleeping, so I called to her and said something like, "I think I might be in labor." The stomach cramps were still there - coming and going. She talked me into calling Arun. It was about 3:30am by this point. I had to call his parent's home number (can't remember what was wrong with his cell) and wake up his mom. I told her I thought I was in labor and to wake up Arun. He said drink water and rest, which I had already tried. But, to let our denial play out as long as possible, I tried it again. I called him back and he had found a flight that left Richmond at 6am.

Now the order of events get a little fuzzy. I remember calling Yael, our midwife, but really wanting to wait until it wasn't the middle of the night. I think I waited until 5ish. I paged her and there was no answer. I think I tried to sleep again, but the contractions were coming to quickly to fall asleep in between. Around 6 we tried to page Yael again and she called back. (those times are probably wrong) I sent Nile out to get me some Gatorade to sip on. I tried to take a shower, but it was *not* relaxing. In the shower I started moaning through contractions which seemed to help a bit, but I was in far too much pain to be getting in and out of the shower by myself. I wasn't sure how I was going to get out. Nile came back with the Gatorade as I was getting out. I remember trying to decide what to wear. I think I didn't want to wear pants, but ended up putting on loose fitting green capris and a tshirt. At some point Nile timed some contractions and talked to the midwife on the phone. I remember being surprised that it hurt so much.

There is a blank in my memory from there until Arun called to say he was in a cab coming home from the airport. I think by then I was kneeling on the floor with my arms on the birthball and really moaning/yelling through the contractions. The sun was up. I remember Arun getting home and him talking to Yael on the phone and then calling the car service. Nile was sitting at the dining room table and looking a little overwhelmed. I was so glad he was home, but he seemed to be panicking a bit. I was feeling good between contractions, but they were getting really intense.

Nile didn't come with us to the hospital. We slowly make our way down to the car between contractions. Down the hallway. Contraction. Elevator. Contraction. Lobby. Contraction. Side walk. I had to stop just before getting in to the car for another one. I was on my hands and knees leaning on Arun in the back of the car. Arun was giving directions to the driver. I was embarrassed that I was making so much noise. I scared the driver so much that he drove a half a block past the hospital. Arun made him back up down 10th Ave. Good thing it was Sun morning.

Out of the car. Contraction. Sidewalk. Contraction. Doorway. Contraction. We had to share our elevator with some one on a gurney. I was yelling through the contractions.

When we finally got to the Birthing Center the nurses came to help me and asked us to wait in the conference room because our birthing room was not ready. I was yelling that I could feel something coming and I thought I was going to have the baby right there. I took off my pants and they put a bunch of chucks under me. I thought it was the baby's head, but it was the amniotic sac bulging and then bursting. They had another midwife come in whose name was Sylvie because Yael wasn't there yet. She told me what it was and to relax. I think I actually did relax for just a second.

Our room was ready right after that and they had me waddle my way down the hall with the chucks between my legs. Once in the room they got me a birthing stool and I sat on that and leaned on the foot of the bed. This is where the pushing started and this made everything before this seem like cake. It was the most powerful, painful thing that has ever happened to me. It came in waves that overtook my entire body. I felt my insides stretching stretching stretching. I remember screaming as loud as I could with every one but my screams were no where near as intense as the pain. Yael was telling me to use my energy to push down but it was hard to focus on anything.

Then there was a baby. And no more contractions. A baby! A real baby! Not just a sack of potatoes or an alien. Arun came to hug us. Yael asked me what I had, so I looked and it is a girl! which totally surprised me. She cried. I cried. Because I was glad it was over and because there she was in person and she was beautiful and brand new. That was at 9:49am.

Then there was a placenta that I don't remember much about. And then there were the stitches that sucked a lot. It took forever and all I wanted to do was touch our new baby. There were 100 phone calls. They finally got us all settled in bed and nursing and Mia pooped a huge sticky meconium poop all over our sheets and blankets. It got everywhere. After cleaning that up we snuggled in for a nap but I didn't sleep. Eventually, we ordered Indian food that was gross. I took a shower with help from a nurse - possibly the best part of the hospital stay. She handed me the soap and made what would have been a very embarrassing situation funny. I felt great after the shower. My mom and Doug got to the hospital that afternoon around 5pm and we left the hospital at 8pm.

I don't remember many details about the first night or the next couple days except there was a lot of taking the nursing pillow on and off. I do remember having an overwhelming urge to be touching Mia at all times. It made me very uncomfortable when other people held her for too long. Not Arun so much, but anyone else. I also remember that at night I wasn't upset about not sleeping because I loved looking at and touching Mia so much. Monday my dad and Ben, Leela and Pop, and Mutt and Shubha came for a quick visit. Melissa came for a couple days that week. My mom stayed for 2 weeks and then Arun's mom came for 2 weeks after that.

she says

she calls Nala 'wawa' and water 'baboo'.